Maybe you’re like me. Maybe every day in some way you feel like a newly fallen turnip. A rookie. A beginner. A little wet behind the ears. When I had a baby, I glanced over my shoulder to discover regurgitated breast milk dripping down my back. That’s when everything — not just motherhood — seemed a little more important. A little more up in a ponytail. A little more up in the air.

Posts Tagged "terror"

Auditioning 101: Avoid it if You Can (And You Can’t)

The following post is part of a guest blog for my dear friend Sarah at She is kicking off a fantastic series for Creative-types to help inspire, challenge, and inform the creative process no matter what your creative outlet may be. And for you actor/singer types, you know there’s one part of the process…   read more

Do Zen and Pediatric Dentistry Go Together? A tale of Awestruck Angst.

If you were to tell me the activities on today’s agenda a week ago, I would have thought that Satan and his worst demons had collaborated on the itinerary. Dentist. Mall. Chuck-E-Cheese. Gordon leaving me at home with Both Things for a two-day conference. Laundry. Even just the first item, Dentist, would have been enough…   read more

My Little Anti-Dentite

Drew is already asking for birthday presents, and his most recent request is “a yittle cooler yike Wall E’s.” If you’ve seen the Disney movie “Wall E” you might remember how at the beginning, a solitary robot meanders through mile-high stacks of carefully molded garbage bricks, scraping trash into the middle of his “body” or…   read more

Let’s Go to the Movies. Kinda Sorta.

On Monday, the staff of the church where I work took a “family movie day” at Hollywood Theater down the street. Drew has only had one movie-going experience (“Cars 2”) which was only a success because we found our seats so early that all the lights were on and the cleaning crew was still sweeping…   read more

Thunder Itself

I was surprised to learn that summer doesn’t really begin until June 20. Isn’t that Halloween? With the weather heating up to hell-worthiness and the mosquitoes out for my children’s blood, I think summer really began this weekend. And with it came some fantastic thunderstorms. If there is anything Thing One is more afraid of…   read more

Urine Trouble, Mister

I’ve been trying to pinpoint why I have been in such a bad mood all week. Granted, there’s the matter of the Womanly Shadow that has been cast, and the fact that Drew has been sick, and the fact that one of my best friends is going through something terrible, and life has just…gotten under…   read more

Review: Casa’s “Charlotte’s Web”

It’s terrific! It’s radiant! It’s Some Show. For anyone who didn’t grow up watching the classic movie or reading the classic E.B. White novel, here’s the runt-down (pun intended): A little piglet is born onto the Arable farm is saved from the chopping block by eight-year-old Fern who lovingly names him Wilbur. Wilbur begins to…   read more

Should I Be Ho-Ho-Honest?

I was minding my business one night when I heard someone talking to himself upstairs. It was Drew. I shut the music off on my computer and closed my eyes to listen. “Santa is a good guy. He not have to hug you. He goes away.” My son, without any professional instruction, had discovered the…   read more

Franken-Thing Two and Other Bad Costumes.

Once, and I’m not particularly proud of this, Gordon and I went as Adam and Eve to a corporate Halloween party in downtown Fort Worth. Our costume looked something like this: I don’t know whose idea this costume was, and my most distinct memory is how far below his actual nipples Gordon’s painted-on-polyester nipples were….   read more

Split Endings: An Ode to Mary

A couple of weeks ago, my hairdresser broke up with me. I had been trying to find a way to end it myself, but she made it easy. It was the conclusion of a seven-year relationship, a relationship that was full of tenderness, sympathy, understanding – everything but monogrammed bath towels. We didn’t have the…   read more